Santa Pic... who cried?

Ended up at the mall yesterday with LB and my mom and she asked me if she could pay for a Santa picture.  I had no idea how it would go.  LB did not cry.  He was totally amazed at Santa and stared him down, we couldn't even get him to look at the camera.  But my mother let the tears flow.  And Santa handed the baby over to me and hugged grandma, asked if it was her first, and told her everything was going to be okay.  It was a sight to behold!  (Wish I had gotten a pic of that!)   

Then they rode the mall train together and I could not tell who was happier. 

My mom had just turned 18 years old when I came along and she was single by 20.  We grew up together.   Our relationship has been less than ideal over the years, but I do love her.  She is on a mission to be the best grandma she can be and LB and I are both grateful for that.  I bite my tongue a lot (basically she allows him to do anything and everything) but there is no doubt that she loves her grandson.    

11 months

I quit doing monthly posts here because I created a blog with just monthly updates to share with grandparents.  They are so long and I don't want to bore anyone here with all of the things that we are "awww-ing" over.  However, I have not done the 11 month post (or finished the one for 10, 9, 8... sigh) and thought I would double dip this month.  Plus, it will be a good time to go along with our new blog look since we took family pics this month:]  

October 10- November 10 (not quite finished with monthly pic yet)
Weight- Guessing 18 1/2 lbs 
Height- Guessing around 28"

Clothing- started in 9 months and transitioned to 12 months

Diapers- size 3

Hair- Blonde

Eyes- Blue

Feeding- Between 25- 30 ounces of formula, combination of baby food and solids

Sleeping- 2-3 hour stretches, waking around 6 a.m. for the day, yep.  (I have high hopes of posting something different here next month!) 

Favorites- ball, z.any z.oo, any game of chase, music (listening, not dancing), T.homas the Train

Firsts- high school football game, pulling up and standing, steps, presidential election, Halloween

This month more than ever you were such a little boy rather than a baby.  It was really a month of big stuff!  Where do I begin?

Grandma taught you to stick your feet up during diaper changes when she says "let me smell your feet."  Of course, she says "shoo-wee" and you either think it's funny or crazy, not sure which.  I hate to say but they really can be smelly!  Speaking of your feet, they are really chunky!  We finally found a pair of shoes that you can't- or don't- pull off.  They are a 3 1/2 wide with latches from S.tride R.ite.  The sales lady took one look at your feet and said "he is going to always need a wide."  Lol.  I adore your smelly, fat feet!  

First real shoes! 

 Those fat feet have been busy taking first steps!  You did it once at granny's house and we pulled out the phone video and caught it the next time too.  Since then you have been pulling up everywhere and on (unfortunately) anything (this has led to several tumbles & even a bruise on your head) but you are so proud!  You will not take steps unless we are standing there with our hands outstretched and you just can't quite figure out how to slow down and take your time.  Instead, it's more of a run and fall into our arms right now.  Your balance is getting better every day so I don't think it will be too much longer!  You love for someone to hold each hand and let you guide them where you want to go.  (Note, if you watch the video turn down the volume because you would think the child just ran a marathon the way we all cheered!:)

Boy, you love a ball and always have.  So that's our first birthday theme, All Stars... a post for next month and I don't want to think about that yet. You will roll a ball all over the house and chase it as long as someone will follow you around.   

You have gotten better with eating solids but I can't say that you're a good eater when it comes to trying new things.  The foods you eat pretty consistently are avocados, sweet potatoes, green beans, grilled chicken, applesauce and (sometimes) bread.  We've tried lots of other things but you spit out and then toss in the floor what you don't like after one try.  Not so cute:[  You eat solids in small bites on your high chair tray or on a placemat at the table.  Plates and bowls are useless.  You pick them up and turn them over as fast as you can.  (You have always liked to look at the bottom of things, what is that about?!?)  And I know this is not a smart move, but you love a straw with some sweet tea or cherry coke zero every now and then.  I also found out that you get a teaspoon of coffee every Tuesday morning, compliments of a passed on tradition says your grandpa B. 

First Halloween- We only made it to grandparent's houses and you started out cranky but you ended up smiley and looked so cute as our little slugger!  

I could write so much about all of the things you are doing now but time is very limited so a list of other fun 11 month things is just going to have to do!

You are picking up your paci and putting it in your mouth, with attitude.
You love to play with the door stoppers!
Nothing makes you laugh out loud more than a game of chase with mom or dad and the word "boo!"
You LOVE hiking, thank you dad's back!

You love to copy our sounds and (attempt to copy) some words.  You have said three words consistently since you could put sounds together, in this order- hey, ma-ma, da-da and mmmm (when eating and you like something).  When we ask you "how do the doggies go"  you respond with heavy breathing and it is so funny. 
Six teeth, four on the top and two on the bottom!
You love to crawl over things and look back at us like "did you see that?"
You do great in stores and restaurants as long as it is short trips.  I don't think you could be a whole day shopper but you enjoy an evening trip out.
You turn the lights off from your diaper changing table and point to them when they come on.  You are mesmerized by lights.  I can't imagine how a Christmas tree is going to last long!
You are starting to get what "no" means and it sure does hurt your feelings.  It's for your own good, I promise!  

Two overnights this month at grandma's.  The plan is for you to spend the night there once a month on Sunday night when I am out of work on Monday so I can pick you up after your morning nap.  I make big plans to get stuff done during this time while she spoils you rotten.  You get to sleep in her comfy bed and evidently she spends most of the night watching you sleep and feeling your diaper ready to change it if you wet.  The first night, she forgot to take her cell to bed so I spent about 45 minutes trying to get an update and I was MAD when I finally got a response.  Oh, gosh I was at the point of panic and had sent her a text of every letter of the alphabet trying to get her to respond.  She was genuinely sorry and (I think) learned... if you want the baby back again, you will keep your phone close by! 

We took family pictures this month.  During your nap time and I forgot your afternoon feeding.  Um, how does one forget to feed their child?  Nevertheless, you held out pretty good and she got one shot that totally melts my heart.  I have ordered it in a large print for the living room. I will finish this post with that print.  We love you so very much sweet boy!!!  

 

10 Thoughts, One Post

Lots of thoughts that I would like to put in ten different posts but I struggle to get one in these days, so... in no particular order:

1.  Debt Diet- both words should make the "four letter" word list!  Ugh!  PC and I have both determined we must buckle down and get our debt down to our mortgage and my college loans--- fast.  That means paying off a couple of small loans and two credit cards--- fast.  We both have jobs- good news these days, but we have both taken pay cuts- not so good.    

2.  The ALI group that met IRL- so cool.  I got teary eyed looking at all those little miracles together and thinking about how everyone in that group just "gets it."  When is the party moving way down South?  :] 

3.  Ordered some invitations for LB's first birthday.  omg.  Even though it's going to be a small family deal, I can't believe that it's so close and it's for our baby!!!  Pinch me because it doesn't seem real!

4. Halloween

5.  It's really okay with me that I have a mini-PC in every way except I was so hoping LB would not get the picky eater habits.  I know it's still early in the solids-introducing phase but it is not looking good.  PC could eat goldfish crackers for every meal and it looks like the same is true for LB and puffs.  Sigh.

6.  Sleep- I don't know where to even begin so this just needs to be a post in the near future.     

7.  Even though I've had this blog for years, I don't think I've kept up with how to improve it's functionality (is that a word?) so I'm asking for any tips to make it easier to read and comment to your blogs.  As it is now, I read blogs from links on my sidebar or links from comments.  Is there a better way?  Blog reader?  And is there an easier way to add blogs?  I have to copy/paste the link to my sidebar from my settings.  Why when I click on "follow" does it just not add that blog?  Sorry, virtually challenged.

8-10.  I've ran out of time for more thoughts and that is typical these days.  I feel like I am always running without any "me" time.  I'm not talking about a bath with a book, I'm talking about a shower with enough time to shave!  I'm adding this to the #6 post- to be continued! 

Alligator Roll Advice

I sincerely appreciate the advice for how to handle the diaper/clothes changing "alligator roll" (very fitting description 3B, 2B, 1B) but this is how the something to hold strategy goes over in our house.  Lol 

The Fun and the Not So Fun

I took great measures to make sure the grocery store balloon was secure onto the cart but didn't think about it coming loose from the balloon end!  PC and I were too busy choosing bagels and yogurt to see it happen or the look on LB's face, which I'm sure would have been pretty funny.   

This pulling up business has me stressed out!  LB has had some rough tumbles lately.  He has started pulling up on lots of things that do not support his weight and, if we're not within arm's reach, down he goes.  I try to act calm and cool with each fall but I am not cut out to be an actress!  There is a reason it's called hard wood floors, my poor baby's head:[   

 

Diapering and changing clothes has become quite the challenge these days.  LB flip flops around all over the place and sometimes I give up and off goes a (happy) little naked LB.  I asked my sitter and MIL about this behavior and they have told him a stern "no" and the little stinker is an angel for them.  So, I tried that.  Evidently I don't speak the right kind of "no" language.  Whew!

Am I the only one in blog land with a 10 1/2 month old who has never slept through the night?  We keep waiting... and waiting...

Lately I have been trying to organize LB's pictures from his first year to give them to a high school student who is interested in video to turn them into a DVD/slideshow for Christmas.  I am so excited about it but going back through the maternity pics to the birth to these precious past months has been emotional to say the least.  Especially when I found songs I wanted to go with each category... Mi.racle by C.eline D.ion and The D.ay B.efore Y.ou by Rascal Flatts... gah, instead of a box of popcorn I will need a box of Kleenex to actually watch the thing when it's done!

Then I start thinking about Thanksgiving and a ONE year old and Christmas... Blessed and I've said it here time and time again but I mean it... beyond grateful!  Even with the lack of sleep:] 

Getting in front of the lens

A co-worker/friend passed along this article to me recently.  She said it's so true and something she wish she had read years ago when her boys were little.  It's about the mom staying in the pictures.  If you haven't read it yet, it's worth your time.  It really struck a chord with me.  Here we are nearly 12 months into our little guy's year of firsts and I am in a handful of pictures, always feeling the need to be the one to get the picture or to have at least partial hair and makeup in tact.

So when I woke up to the sound of the camera for the picture below, I was fussing at PC.  "Gah... delete that... no makeup, hair is pulled back in a mess... " and he said "but y'all look so sweet together."  I'm glad he didn't listen.  Who cares?  This is how we spend at least half of the night and when our little guy finally starts sleeping through the night, or in a big boy bed, this picture will hold a treasured memory.

And this one.  We're introducing new foods and some don't agree so well with LB's tummy.  This is him with an upset tummy and I just want him to know that I am right there.  My arms wrapped around him, telling him I love him and that I'm so sorry his tummy hurts and I wish I could make it better.

If I hadn't handed the camera over for this, I would have missed the best kiss ever.

From here on out, I am getting in front of the lens and making my best effort to capture those moments that yell "mom is right here!"  And moments that tell a story of how much I love being LB's mom, even if it's not always picture perfect.  

Our Family

For years I have attempted to maintain a level of anonymity here because PC and I are private to a fault.  I also really don't want to share my dysfunctional ovary woes with just anyone IRL. 

But last year those dysfunctional ovaries produced  2 good eggs and I gave birth to 1 super sweet miracle baby, thanks to modern medicine & prayers.

And I can also picture everyone on the blogs that I read the most and truly appreciate that you share so many aspects of your life with people you've never met.  Frankly, it becomes frustrating not always being able to place a face with a name.

Plus I turned 36 yesterday and know there are more important things in life than worrying about any IRL stalkers who are interested in my infertility. 

So there's no time like the present.  The seriously about to kick some butt cowboy PC and his trashy saloon girl Miss Mac and their little outlaw LB are coming out to say hello and that they had a blast this weekend going out of town for a little family adventure.  :]  

Where did the baby go?

When I was a little girl, one of my favorite L.ittle G.olden B.ooks was Where Did the Baby Go?  I have somehow held on to it and it now sits on LB's shelf.  It's a story about a little girl who finds a picture of a baby and asks her mom where she can find this baby.  She looks around the house and finally tries on a hat, smiles in the mirror and realizes that she is the baby in the picture.

 

 I have thought about that book several times recently because I have been asking the same question!

Where did the baby go that once laid in the crib and looked so tiny?

Now we have lowered the mattress because our little baby started turning the monitors on and off!

Where did the baby go that was so excited about seeing a ball?

Now we are running to grab cords and "save him" when he gets stuck behind furniture from chasing a ball!

Where did the baby go that used to ride around in his car seat in the stroller caddy?

Now he looks like such a big boy riding around in a shopping cart!

Where did the baby go with the gummy grin?

Now he has a grin with 3.5 teeth!  (side note:  .5 front tooth has been m.e.a.n :( and please excuse the rice cake crumbs) 

Where did the baby go that had to have pillows under his feet in the Jumperoo?

Now his feet easily touch the ground!

Where did the baby go that needed me the entire bath time?  

Now he needs lots of play time without me (although I am cheering from less than 1 foot away)!

Wow, it feels like LB is growing and changing so much that it won't be long until we are getting ready for school!

Geez, mom!  Quit being so sentimental... I like doing big boy things!  

And some expressions never change:] 

Crazy good times

Life.  Feels so upside down right now but is overflowing with memories that will last a lifetime!  For example, I wanted to check in with the blog world tonight (finally) and post a picture or two, which led to a massive search for my iPhone.  I called it from our land line.  I heard the hum but couldn't figure out for the life of me where it was coming from... until... wait... no, surely I did not...  Um, yes, I did.

See that front pocket of LB's lunch/milk tote?  The front pocket would be the location of my "5 hours in the fridge smart phone" with a dumb baby brain owner!  It's okay, feel free to laugh along with me.

PC (already in the bed) heard me laughing so I proceed to tell him what happened.  His response, "that's not really good for your phone."  Um, babe, do you really think it was intentional?

I had another post in mind but I spent too much time looking for my phone and then defrosting it.  

Crazy good times... how are you all doing? :]

Memorable Moment Monday

I am covered up with returning to work and August/May are the two months of the year that I am stressed to the max with work obligations... but thank goodness that I did not miss this yesterday...

  

those feet are blurry because they are moving and so is LB!  We have a crawl/slither/scoot-er in the house and I just know that he is going to get faster and go further every day now!  Must make time soon for baby-proofing!  By the way, that train is LB's favorite and PC and I frequently have the following tune stuck in our heads "Riding on the train, come and ride with me.  Let's look out the window to see what we can see."  Frequently as in all the time.  Fun times:] 

Memorable Moment Monday

 

Special on aisle 12!  I understand baby boy.  T.arget wears me out too! :]

Who is 40 today?

One of the coolest, cutest dad's on the blog block IMO:]  

40 has never looked better.  

I love you.

 Happy Birthday PC!

Happy Camper

LB experienced his first camping trip last weekend- in a tent on an inflatable air mattress that kept going flat through the night.  We rough'ed it while his grandparents & aunt/uncle/cousins (PC's side) stayed in their fancy campers, which we are now in the market for too since LB LOVED it!  He slept better on the deflating air bed than he has at home in weeks and he only cried when his body reached the sleepy stage and he was too afraid to miss out on something.  
His cousins (tween and teen) took him for stroller rides, fed him, and took turns changing diapers.
His grandparents fought over who he was reaching for and smiling at the most.
His aunt sang him to sleep and his uncle tossed him high up in the air. 
With all of those helping hands, PC got to go on a few bike rides around the campground and I got to take a long shower, which felt good even in a bathhouse!
He had a bite of a peach, biscuit, blackberry jelly & strawberry shortcake.  
He was big stuff in the swing!
He was big stuff in the pool!
There was a fair in town and LB was in awe of the sights and sounds.  We "won" (okay, just paid $5 for the souvenir) a Boots inflatable and it made our little guy so happy.  And guess what other souvenir LB came home with?  A bottom tooth!!!  Exciting times around here:]

Smiling because I finally cut that bottom tooth! 

Poop, it sometimes doesn't happen

Warning:  A post about poop, or lack thereof.   
Spoiler:  We now have a regular little pooper:] 

We have several baby "issues" that are a work in progress (sleep, teething, rashes, etc).  But, for now, we are winning in the battle against constipation (knock on wood).

The problem:  About a week into solids, LB started pooping about every 3 days.  Day 3 was miserable, for him and for us.  Very ill baby who would strain and whimper and look at us like "do something."  :[  (Sh)It usually happened in the afternoon so we would put him on the changing table, move his legs in a "pedaling" motion and spend about 10-15 minutes there and this poor baby worked hard!

After a call to the pedi and some crazy advice from grandma, here is what got things err... moving... around here.

Diet change- eliminated rice and bananas.  I found one website that said to remember no BRAT- banana, rice, apples, toast.  Switched to oatmeal.

Pedi-lax glycerin suppositories- this was a recommendation from the pedi on those "day 3's" when LB was straining so hard.  We used these grudgingly and sparingly but they worked instantly and provided him instant relief.  They come 6 to a box and I would say that we used about 8-10 total over those first few weeks of working on the issues.  We did not want him to become dependent on them so they were a last resort.

Prunes & apple prune juice- Daily.  One small jar (or half) of the prunes and 3-4 ounces of watered down juice.

And last, you know grandma has to have a say about it.  So she told me to pull out his little toilet (that she bought way too early because of her grand potty training plans) and just sit him on it when we started to see the strained look.

I'll be darn.  For 21 days straight, he has sit on that potty, leaned on me, and pooped like a champ.  PC would have a fit if I put the picture in its entirety here and it is a strange but pretty cute sight.  All he needs now is a bathroom reader lol! 

 
 

PAIL- July- Family Building

~Thoughts on the July PAIL theme ~

We are done with the life and part-time job that is otherwise known as ART.  In my mind, that closes a door on additional children through the "good 'ol fashioned" way.  Could it happen?  Well, holding this baby makes me think anything is possible.  But do I want to actively try by charting BBT and using OPKs and studying EWCM?  Nope.  I no longer want to be consumed with the acronyms!  

Child-spacing?  Ha!  That was truly my first thought.  I remember when we first started TTC I wanted to plan the time of year the child was born to be more convenient with my work schedule.  Ha again!  It's sad that that's funny to me and funny that that's sad.  It happens for so many right on schedule... I am still amazed.  This topic brings so many TTC emotions to the surface and the bitterness- obviously it is still there- it's just not on the forefront as I am beyond grateful to have one.  Repeat- beyond grateful to have one.      

Our original plan was the white picket fence with 2.0 kids (girl & a boy no doubt) and a dog.  The reality has become a black wrought iron fence with 1.0 IVF miracle baby and 3 dogs.  Blessed.  But IF threw us a curve ball.  It meant we had discussions about having no children, about adoption and then we entered the world of ART.  It means I have a blog of 4 years worth of trials, tears and then ultimately (thank you God) TRIUMPH!  

A family of 3 we will be and we are all smiles about that, 

even though LB appears to be thinking it over lol.     

   

Cheap Entertainment

We are swimming in toys around here and LB does have some favorites but some of the best "toys" to entertain baby are not F.isher P.rice!  Enter...in no particular order...

1.  The remote- Loves this gadget so much that we pulled one that doesn't work out of a drawer and stuck it in the diaper bag.  I know it probably looks funny at church when we use it for a distraction, but it provides several minutes of serious play time.

2.  Our watches- It used to take the entire diaper change for LB to pull off my favorite N.ike watch but now he's got it down to 0.2 seconds flat.  He pulls it off, looks up to see my reaction and then throws it in the floor every. single. diaper. change.  Dad's is not quite as fun as it latches but any watch is still a point of interest.

3.  The iRoomba- I would like to know what he's thinking when this thing spins around the room.  He likes this from a distance... when it enters his personal space, he's not so sure.

4.  The paper towel holder- LB is not really into waiting patiently for me or dad to fix a bottle so he enjoys giving the paper towels a spin in the mean time!

5.  Feet/Toes- Good for holding, sucking, grasping... when there is nothing else around, the feet will just have to do!

6.  Hair pulling- namely, mine.  No picture because I am too busy untangling and explaining why that's not supposed to be fun!

Honorable mentions- paper bags, hats, eye glasses, spoons, light switches, cell phones, computers, straps/tags, napkins, mirrors, wallets and lotion bottles!

Fun at the Zoo

We decided to venture to a zoo that's about a 90 minute drive from our house this past Saturday.  Despite the hot weather, it was a fun day as a family of 3!  LB was more interested in his shadow than the animals but he was so happy to be outdoors taking in new sights and sounds.   

Cool, a shadow! 

Who are you calling a monkey?

First taste of Gelato is so good I'll close my eyes and savor!

LB was so exhausted by the time we got back to the car that he actually was happy to be put in his car seat for once. Good times:]  

Thanks for the Mammaries!

Blog title- I digress.  PC said this recently and we totally cracked up.  Blame it on the lack of sleep. 

But it is time for the ladies to go part-time.  Or that's what I am wondering... can the ladies just take over the night shift or is it all or nothing? 

I am proud and thankful for our nearly seven month run.  Not quite long enough to make it on the cover of T.ime magazine, lol, but I am grateful.  I have always had to supplement but have given this baby every ounce of breastmilk possible through pumping and nursing.  It has been a part of bonding with my son but it's just been that, a part.  We enjoy bonding with the "boo" game at the changing table and playing on the blanket in the living room floor just as much!   

Several reasons, but mainly the supply is dwindling since introducing solids and I want to return to work without having to think about the pump, pump parts, storage, nursing bra/pads, etc.         

Side note:  To those who formula fed, breastfed for a shorter/longer amount of time... you are feeding the baby the best way possible for your situation and will not get any judgment here.  Geez, I can't believe people have even felt like they have to justify how they feed their babies.  I've seen some posts lately that have made me cringe!  Feed the baby=healthy baby= it's all good!

I want to see more of this anyway.... 

What do I see?

When LB was just a couple of weeks old, we noticed what we thought was a scratch.  At his 2 month check-up, the pedi said it could be a scratch or could be a birthmark.  We were confused because he didn't have it "at birth" but we learned that it could be a hemangioma, a collection of blood vessels under the skin.  At the 4 month check-up it was definitely diagnosed as a hemangioma.  It will grow during his first 1-2 years, then "rest," then slowly regress... leaving no scar or indication that it was ever there.  LB has the kind (so far) that will stay closer to the skin while others turn a deeper bruise-like color and form a knot.  We did check into medical options but they are invasive and leave scars... a no brainer for us, we did our research and we will let it do its thing unless it ends up closer to his eye. I do not even consider using photo.shop on his pictures... it is part of him, it is part of his birth story.  The people who are around him the most- we don't even "see" it anymore.  He's just our sweet LB.      
  
Other people look at LB differently.  It's okay!  I understand that it stands out.  I understand that people want to ask but are not sure what to ask.  Sometimes I just start explaining, sometimes I don't.  Kids are great- they just come out and say "baby have boo boo" and I tell them "it doesn't hurt, baby is okay and it will go away" and kids are happy with that.  Love kids.  What I don't understand and frankly what hurts is when a person is getting ready to say "he's a cutie/sweetie/etc" but they stop... and it is obvious.  All mamas think their baby is the cutest, sweetest thing...I don't need anyone to say it... I am just taken aback that his hemangioma makes people standoff-ish.  He's just a baby with a bump!  And I would take him with big bumps, little bumps, red bumps, blue bumps...  didn't mean to sound Dr. S.euss here but you get this took-a-long-time-so-thankful-IVF-worked-I-will-keep-him mama's point! 
 
It does make me think.  When I see a child who has some kind of scar or birthmark, do I stare or do I smile?  I hope that I can always say that I smile and see a precious gift.  When I see a child running from his or her parents or shouting, do I think the parents need to have better control or do I have compassion knowing they may have a child with autism or an emotional behavior disorder?  I hope that I can have compassion and see a precious gift. 

This is from the heart and I appreciate everyone listening.  My baby's bump will go away.  Some are not so lucky and would gladly trade a hemangioma for what their baby has to go through.

I am beyond grateful. Blessed beyond measure.

  I see my precious gift in this child from head to toe, hemangioma, slobber and all:]