B.eautiful D.isasters

I have no idea what the song is about.  

But it is a fitting title of life since bringing home a baby. 

You already know about the G.enetian Violet and the built-ins.  Oops!

Then there was moving the rock-n-play across the hardwood floor.  Oops!!

Then there was moving the Jumperoo to another room and scratching the door.  Oops!!! 

Then there was moving furniture around to make way for baby furniture and causing marks on the paint.  Oops!!!!  

Then there was sleep deprived PC who missed his mouth with a morning E.spresso. Oops!!!!! 

  

These are just a few of what I am sure will be many b.eautiful d.isasters in our home.  This chapter of our lives is filling up with so many wonderful memories that all the scratches and stains are telling our stories.  They are truly turning our house into a home, even if we don't quite see it that way right when it happens.  I wouldn't want it any other way.  

Breastfeeding... I thought we were friends!

Something is going wrong with breastfeeding.  It feels like I'm on a downward spiral and I only have two more weeks until returning to work.  I think there are some good formulas on the market and I supplement about 2 oz each evening before his bedtime.  However, I have worked so hard these first 10 weeks to breastfeed that I would like to continue as long as I can. 
In a nutshell, if I pump, there is not enough for the next feeding... so I started supplementing that feeding with pumped breastmilk... which totally defeats the purpose.  Now I pump between 8 p.m. and 1 a.m. since that is such a long stretch between feedings but it's not going to be enough for that first day I return to work.  It's weird because he has pulled off and acted irritated like he wants more, but then the times between feedings have grown longer recently.
I have sought out so much information about breastfeeding and have tried suggestions through the LC, blogs and reading materials.  I am eating oatmeal, drinking more water, doing the massage techniques to help during pumping, etc.  I will say I am not eating like I should... eating a late breakfast and usually I either have a good lunch or supper but not both.
I read somewhere that once you start supplementing or pulling from the fridge/freezer stash you are telling your body to "make 2 oz less" but why should that be the case if I pump when he gets that extra 2 oz during a long stretch until the next feeding?  Also, does anyone have a baby that sleeps a long stretch like 1 a.m. to 6 a.m. who maintains their supply?  This has only happened once or twice but the baby is my alarm clock through the night... if he hits snooze, so do I!  

Last week breastfeeding/pumping schedule (although I feed on demand so times are not exact)-
8:30 a.m.- BF
9:00 a.m.- P
11:30 a.m.-BF
1:30 p.m. -BF
4:00 p.m.- BF
4:30 p.m.- P
6:30 p.m.- BF & Supplement- 2 oz
8:00 p.m.- "top off" BF
between 12:00-1:30 a.m.- BF
4:30 a.m.- BF
6:30 a.m.- BF


This week breastfeeding/pumping schedule-
9:00 a.m.- BF (today I had to pull out a little more from fridge to satisfy him)
(No more pumping here because my supply was so low for the next feeding.)
12:00 p.m.- BF
2:00 p.m.- BF
4:30 p.m.- BF
6:30 p.m.- BF
8:00 p.m.- BF & supplement
9:00 p.m.- P
1:00 a.m.- BF
6:00 a.m.- BF

I can't figure out if this is just a another bump in the road...perhaps another growth spurt... or if we are going to have to take a whole new path.  I want our baby to be as healthy as possible and I know breastmilk helps with that, but I also want him to get a full tummy and be happy!  Don't tell me "it gets easier" lol.  It's true that some things are getting easier, but breastfeeding remains on the "always a work in progress" list!!!          

Not a SAHM

Update:  We went to a new pediatric office today.  Guess what?  They did not kick us out!  We told the nurse practitioner we think modern medicine is great (hence the IVF baby) but that we just wanted to wait a little longer and spread the vaccines out.  She listened and treated us like... the parents!  Yay!

In other news, I have three weeks left with our little man before returning to a 40+ hour work week.  I have cherished every minute of this time with our little guy.  I am going to soak in every snuggle, smile, coo, cry and poop... yes, I will miss those moments too!  Not going back to work has never been an option for me.  This maternity leave has also taught me that I'm not cut out to be a stay at home mom.  Hats off to those who take care of the baby AND the home... cooking, cleaning, going to the grocery store... for real?  During the two hours that our little guy takes a routine nap my time is filled with- pumping, washing pump parts, finish getting dressed, eating something, cleaning pacifiers... sometimes I skip the finish getting dressed part to write a blog post!  Then he's awake for the rest of the day with the exception of a couple of quick afternoon naps and we eat, play, change diapers and repeat.  I don't feel like I can do anymore than just survive the day and wait anxiously on PC to pull in the driveway.  Somehow I think going back to work will force me to accomplish more in less time and that I will just feel better- physically & emotionally.  However, my heart is going to be very heavy those first days back in that world.  When I think about that day approaching so quickly, I choke back tears.  Although my baby will be in good hands and will be at home for three days of the week, no one will take care of him in the same way as his mama.  I will miss him...terribly.  I will not be returning as the worker I was before.  I will not be the last one to leave.  In fact, I will be counting down to the minute that I can get out the door and home to nurse this sweet boy.

Well.  Sh*t.  Now I'm wishing I had the option to change my mind!  

Multi-Brumping

Because it is Wednesday.  Because I am lacking for adult conversation.  Because I have spent more time with my breasts the past two months than my entire life.  I have invented a new word for entertainment purposes.

Multi-Brumping

Defined:  All of those other things that moms do while breastfeeding and pumping in addition to adoring the baby.

Here's my list, starting with the more obvious:
Stare at baby
Talk to baby
Sing to baby
Cut baby's fingernails
Pull flakes out of baby's hair
Pick lint out of baby's hands (I promise I bathe my baby, but this stuff is always there!)
Tickle baby's feet
Rub baby's cheeks
Rock baby chair with my foot (pumping)
Watch t.v.
Read
Anything on the iPhone- look at pictures, look up websites, read your blogs (but haven't quite mastered the commenting yet), make a phone call, read e-mail, type notes
Eat
Drink
Pray
Think about blog friends
Think about blog posts
Think about my day
Think about things to do
Think about things not to do
Think about all things baby
Think about too many things to list
I guess this would be my most unusual (and it's pretty blah)... put on make-up

What about you? 

Humor us and add your most unusual multi-brumping skills!  In fact, I have a brand new pack of Soothies Gel pads that I would love to send to the person who does the most unusual multi-brumping.  You may need them!  :]   

My Valentines

Last year, the dining room table on Valentine's Day looked like this...

This year, the dining room table looks like this...

Doesn't everyone have the following items on their table?  An empty centerpiece, a planner, bills galore, three pocketbooks (because I can't figure out the whole diaper bag/purse combo thing), hospital papers, pump parts, pens, file folders, rubber bands, newspapers, scissors (?), receipts, and the only things that do belong there... napkins and salt/pepper. 

But this year... I have something even better than a romantic dinner at home with my love.  I have TWO loves.  And take-out on the couch will taste so much better than last year's dinner because my heart is full of love for both of my Valentines! 

And nothing is sexier than a man who does dirty diapers.  

 Happy Valentine's Day!