Conversation yesterday morning:
PC: "It's official."
Me: "I know, can you believe we have a one year old?"
PC: "No, that he hasn't slept through the night in one year and neither have we."
Me: "Did you really think that was going to happen, like magic?"
PC: "I was hoping."
I'm really not posting our (lack of) sleep story for anything other than to look back on these days at some point in our lives and be proud that we survived it! It actually has become quite comical... (or maybe we're just delirious) but either way... this is what it is.
LB's crib is beside our bed. Been there from the previous nursing days when we just took better nightly "naps" when he was within arm's reach. Somewhere between months 6-9 we considered a good night's sleep 8:30ish to 1 a.m. in the crib and then trying to get at least 2 more hours with him in the bed with us before he woke at 5:30.
From months 9-present, things went from bad to worse. First of all, going to bed at 8:30 for me & PC started getting old. PC and I were barely getting any time for each other or to even ask about each other's day and we just needed some down time without all-things-baby. So we started going to bed at 9:30- woo hoo- livin' it up around here:] But LB started waking up at 10:30. So just about the time we were entering REM, we awake to LB's CRY. I have given up on any and all strategies to get him back to sleep in that crib so he gets in the bed with us and that is when the fun begins. LB goes right to sleep, he is in his cozy spot between me and PC. But OMG. He hates cover so we have him sleeping in as little clothing as possible (in the winter, yep) and he still kicks until he is out from any cover. He likes his head up against the baseboard so he wiggles up until he bangs his head against it but not only does he want his head on the baseboard, he wants one or both feet on PC and his hands on me. So then the twisting and squirming begins. Not only does he like his hands on me, specifically he wants them in my hair so he can "comb" it IN HIS SLEEP and, as painful as this could be, if I could sleep through it I did. Until I started seeing the gobs of hair in his hands in the morning and the THINNING spots on my head. Oh s#*t. So I started pulling my hair back tight in a ponytail and putting clips across tight to hold my bangs back. He likes his paci and wiggles and squirms to find it when it falls out. So we keep extras on either side of the bed and PC and I have hit each other many times in attempts to locate that stupid smoothie. Under an armpit? Nestled in my ponytail? Cringe if you must but, no, I do not get up to rinse it off. Mother of the year. Leaks? At least once a week. If it happens before 1 a.m., there is a
middle of the night sheet change but if it happens after 1 a.m., pull the
sheet off before it gets to the mattress pad and find the thickest,
softest towel for a temporary fix. Mother of the year again. I have woken up to toes on my mouth and a butt in my face. Snores and passing gas? Talking? Whiny, squealing-type noises? Yes, yes, double yes. I have had to pull his whole body off of my head like you might do a cat! All in his sleep. All in our bed. Until about 6:15 a.m., if we're lucky.
A full night of sleep? Remind me of what that's like because my
mind is fuzzy from the lack of it!
In some areas, we have been very
fortunate. But sleep is not one of them. Whew.
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17 hours ago
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Gosh, that sounds really rough! Baby G isn't the best sleeper either, but he is sleeping a lot better than that! Especially after we bit the bullet and tried cry it out sleep training since none of the other sleep training methods worked. At least he is out of our bed and in his crib in his own room. Last night for instance he woke up for the first time at 2h45, and then again at 5h45 (DH gets up at 5h00), when DHbrought him to me in bed and that was the last of my sleep time...
Haha, I have to say thank you for writing this so I know I'm not alone in my sleep misery! Although, our situation doesn't sound like it compares to what you are going through. I wish I had advice for you too, but obviously we haven't done so well in this department lately either. Have you seen that picture going around on FB of about 8 different positions kids sleep in the bed with their parents? I thought of that as I read this. :)
I haven't seen the picture but bet I could relate to many of them! We are about to start sleep boot camp around here, which first will be moving the crib back to his room and then probably a combination of some cry it out (but the problem is that his version of crying turns into coughing/choking fits fast!) and maybe taking turns sleeping near his room for awhile just so one of us can get some good rest. I never imagined he would be in our bed his entire first year but it just happened and we just do the best we can. One day we will look back and laugh... maybe!
God sleep struggles have been what has been the hardest for us too! Something about that 8-9 month mark sucks. She was sleeping in be with us fine until then - then all hell broke loose. We finally let her fuss it out a little and she's now sleeping in her own room - was a perfect angel sleeping 7-7 now it's more 6-4:30...so it sucks getting up at 4:30am but it's better than being woken up every hour or two which is what co-sleeping had turned into for us . Good luck - I hope it all works out soon!!!!! This too shall pass.
OMG, I laughed when reading this. It sounds so familiar! My one-year-old is still in our bed too, though it sounds like it might go a little more smoothly than your nights. She also hates the covers, but she hasn't yanked out my hair yet. Ouch! We're still nursing, so instead of hair and a pacifier, she just uses me. Good luck! Report back on how you figure this out, please.
Oh this sounds so familiar. Lexi is in our bed also. While she doesn't pull hair, she is still nursing. She won't take a pacifier - she prefers me instead. We have considered moving her crib to her room (she doesn't use it at all - she freaks out when we put her in it) and trying to let her cry it out some..but she also quickly gets so upset that she vomits, so probably not going to work out so well. I honestly don't know what to do. At this point I would be happy not being used as a pacifier all night!
Oh dear, I couldn't help but LOL at the part about him wanting to 'comb' your hair while he sleep!! Eek! He certainly sounds like a wild little fella in the bed. Definitely don't blame you for not getting up to rince that paci. Alidia has given hers up now but before we barely ever rinsed it and she has only been a bit sick once for one day and I think it was teeth related, so I think it just toughens their systems up! :)
Hope your sleep improves soon!! :) At least you are fortunate in lots of areas though right? Always look on the bright side!
- Fiona
Hey - I pick cheese up off the floor and hand it right back to Matthews. None of us are winning mother of the year ;)
If you're thinking about doing CIO, I suggest buying Ferber's book now and reading the first few chapters. Reading that really helped me understand what was going on in Matthew's brain each night and it helped me think through HOW I wanted to tackle our sleep problem. We did it at 9.5 months - in the height of his sleep issues. It took 2 full weeks but we've never looked back. It's actually much more gentle that you would think. People hear "CIO" and freak out - but it's not what people think.
Good luck. This is hard stuff. My sister is dealing with the exact same thing right now.
troublesometots.com was invaluable to me when working on sleep issues - they really do crave routine and consistency (from reading books to having nigthlights or sound machines that stay on ALL night). good luck!
ps - i miss co-sleeping...
Whoa, that sleep story makes ours look like Heaven. I feel for ya. Samantha went from 7-7 in a crib in her room(with getting up once to eat) to getting up all hours of the night and switching from crib to bouncer to swing. She actually hates paci's and laying in bed with us! So that's out!It hasn't been fun :( I am sooo exhausted. I guess I'm holding out for that miracle when she sleeps through the night! I will pray to the sleep Gods for all of us :)
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