From one IF to another

The following is a recent email conversation with another IF sister that I know IRL.  She went through IVF a few years ago and it didn't work.  My heart hurt to type the words "I'm expecting" and hurt when I got the response because I want this so badly for her too.  I'm posting the conversation here because our words to each other would be so foreign to those who never had trouble conceiving.  But it's as if we spoke back and forth in true IF language and I will always remember what it was like to get to this point and that I have friends through the blog world and IRL who are still fighting and how much I want you/them to WIN. 

Me:  Hi B!  I wasn't sure if you had heard the news that I'm expecting. I wanted to tell you that we went through IVF this past spring... I only had 5 eggs... 4 fertilized... 2 normally (none to freeze) and one stuck!  It's hard to send this to someone who I want the same outcome for so badly on this journey that we didn't ask for.  I know you will still be happy for me... not holding a baby yet, but closer than ever to beating infertility. 

M!  No, I hadn't heard!  I must say, I'm glad to hear it from YOU!  I know it's hard to share with someone who deals with infertility but I'm so glad you did and of course I'm happy for you!  I'm glad you only had to go through IVF once.  It's not the most enjoyable experience is it?  We still have 5 frozen embryos...as I was so friendly reminded when the "storage" bill arrived recently.  Not sure when we'll go through the process to use them...time is running out (turned 38 this summer....ugh.)  In the meantime, we've recently begun paperwork to adopt from China.  The wait is really long, but our hearts our led to see it through.  Back to your good news....please take care of yourself, enjoy, breathe deeply, and take in every precious moment.  You deserve it and are going to be such a great mom!!!

Me:  Thank you!  I couldn't have gone through IVF more than once financially, physically or emotionally so I'm certainly counting my blessings.  I missed so much work and my backside is still sore from the progesterone shots that ended 8 weeks ago!  People think that IVF always works the first time and results in boy/girl twins, so far from the truth!  We just got a bill yesterday for the back-up (required) sample of frozen sperm... people just DON'T know!  It's not that I want anyone to experience it, but some level of understanding and sensitivity from the fertile myrtles would be nice.  I'm excited to hear about the adoption process and I will pray that it happens sooner than later for you!  Just know that you have a supporter here and I will be celebrating when I get the same update from you!!! 

Eek...haven't had those progesterone shots in a while, but I can feel your pain...literally!  And I think it hurts our husbands as much as it hurts us!  You are so right that people just don't know.  One year when we had several pregnancies here, someone said to me, "you should drink from the water fountains."  REALLY?  I can't even respond when people say stuff like that because I'm so dumbfounded and speechless.  I could go on and on about comments from the fertile myrtles, but I won't.  I'm sure you've heard it all, too!

Life is Good

This week, PC and I painted (windows open and fan on) and put up some crown molding in the evolving baby nursery.  We had family over all weekend to celebrate PC's birthday and my sweet cousin stayed with us to paint something special on one wall of the nursery.  We LOVE it.  The theme for the nursery, as well as our lives, is Jeeps, Dogs and Books:] 

Have I said that this still feels like I'm living in a dream?  Have I said thank you God that we are preparing a room for a little miracle baby boy?  Have I said... Life is Good.  Dog Gone. 

Happy Birthday PC!

In one year, some things don't change.

 

You still find time to do things with your nieces that make them laugh and adore you even more.

Then, some things do change.

As you get ready to paint and prepare a room for your son.

The journey gets more interesting and there's no one else I'd rather share it with.  You are a wonderful husband and this little boy will be very lucky to have you as a father.  I love you, PC!  Happy Birthday!!!  

Boppy & need decorating advice!

I'm still laughing about all the scary rocker horse comments.  To be fair, I should probably post a pic sometime of the entire rocker to back-up my earlier statement that it looks like "it belongs in a museum."  That picture shows his "belongs in an asylum" features, lol!   

#1- Boppy- If you are pregnant or when you do get pregnant, I want to say the Boppy Total Body Pillow (shown in the middle of the day bed) has been great!  My mom bought it for me and I was weary at first because it just looked big and bulky but let me say "move over PC."  (Awww, for 20 more weeks anyway!)  I have just started sleeping in our guest room on the day bed because of 2-3 nightly trips to the bathroom and all the tossing and turning, and PC is a light sleeper so it's for both of us!  Anyway, I put pillows behind me and then wrap around the Boppy and it's the best I can do for comfortable side sleeping.

 

 #2- Decorating advice- I know there are some decorator/designer blog buddies out there and I need your help!  We have these built-ins on each side of our fireplace and I can't think of anything to do with them.  I love the storage space below but the top is so boring.  How would it look if I covered them with some type of fabric?  What else can I do with the space?  Any and all advice appreciated!
    

Mid-point ultrasound & scary rocker horse :]

First, I just wanted to say that the comments on the last post were great thoughts on childcare but I realized what I wrote (oops) sounded like my MIL could keep the baby full-time and I turned her down.  For several reasons, she would only be able to keep the baby 1-2 days a week unless we were in a real bind.  It would be ideal if I could find someone (or a great daycare) 2-3 days during the week  and the grandparents could do the other time... so I'll be praying for the right person or situation to cross our path in the next few months:]

Earlier this week we had our mid-point anatomy ultrasound...un-believable... and I'm beyond thankful that we've made it this far!  Surreal.  They scanned the brain, heart, arms, legs, boy parts, profile, bladder and he posed for each shot, lol.  The u/s tech called him Mr. Photogenic and I told her I hope that would be true after he gets here because I love to take pictures!  My mom has already brought up that too much flash may hurt his eyes...gracious... let the advice begin, right?   I have to show y'all one of my favorites... doesn't it look like he's flexing his muscles and showing out already?

It was a fun appointment and made things feel a little more real for us.  We won't get to see him again via u/s for several weeks so I hope that he starts moving around in there more frequently.  I also got blood drawn for what Dr. B6 called the 'quad screening' which checks for levels of four substances that indicate risk of Down's Syndrome, spina bifida, or Trisomy 18.  Dr. B6 says he doesn't see anything that causes concern and the main reason for the test would be knowledge and preparation if something did come back abnormal (which would mean more testing).  It's always nerve wrecking waiting on test results but I have a peace about everything.  I think the next test coming up is the one for gestational diabetes and then maybe I'll have those kinds of things behind me for the rest of the pregnancy.

Lastly, remember this post about scary rocker horse?  I promised a picture when it came to live with us and it now resides in the basement for the time being.  It didn't scare the dogs so maybe we'll be in luck when it comes to the baby:]  However, I rounded the corner last night and my heart nearly flew out of my chest... and I knew it was there!!!  What do y'all think?    That's real human hair, people.  Baby's friend or foe???