It's the "I'm in the middle of another 2WW miserable." One week down, another to go! Anticipation... nerves... what if's... all of those same thoughts that I went through 39 weeks ago during a very emotionally & physically draining time of waiting. Then we got the news that we had been waiting to hear for so long and now I'm waiting to be able to share the news of a lifetime!
Physically, I have to say that I'm just making it day to day right now. I'm still working and pushing myself to get things done but I'm swollen and
Emotionally, I'm not in a (total) fearful state about pain and childbirth. I'm in a nervous/anxious state of wanting this sweet baby boy to get here healthy and safely.
In no way do I mean for this to be a somber post at such a joyful time, just that a major dose of anxiety has kicked in through another 2WW. Bring on the grand finale!!!
PC has been a true partner through all of this, but especially the past few days. Have I ever mentioned that he has been to every single appointment? He takes care of the laundry, keeps the fur babies fed and has been company for them when I just haven't felt like it, helps me with my socks and shoes, massages my back, puts his hand on my stomach every day to experience the baby's movements with me and so many more little things that mean so much. I haven't thanked him or told him how much I appreciate those things enough, but I really, really do! Today he gave me a pregnancy card that was meant to be funny but it brought on laughter and tears at the same time. Worth a share...
Laughed when I opened and saw the front (he knows how much I love to plan) and cried when I got to his note... everything is going to be okay with this man by my side:]
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Its 4pm and I only got out of bed today to eat and pee, and take a bath. My body hurts and I just feel exhausted. I thought that I'd work right up until the baby came, but decided last week that last Friday was all I could handle... I'm planning to work from home next week, as much as I can, but... my goodness. I told ML this morning that I feel like i am nothing more than a vessel for this baby!
So close!
You are getting SO close!! I can't wait to hear all the details of his arrival... Hopefully soon :)
I'm in the same boat...I feel like I spend most of my day on the toilet or just trying to catch up on the sleep that I missed the night before, and all that lying down does nothing for the aches and pains or helping the baby to descend and come faster (at last check, cervix was thinning but not doing too much else).
I'm anxious about starting labor, but excited as well, and I think the lack of knowing when it will start only makes things worse.
Wishing you the best. Oh, and I love the card.
Oh, PC's message brought a tear to me eye too :) So sweet! xx
The last few weeks are the worst with the waiting and being so anxious to meet your little one! I hope he comes soon!
The last couple of days I've started leaking pee all the time, if that makes you feel any better. We're all getting miserable by this point!
The biggest piece of advice I'd have for you is to work on NOT being so fearful about the delivery process. REPEATEDLY tell yourself positive affirmations of "I can do this. My body was made to do this. Every contraction is getting me closer to my baby. This is a normal, healthy pregnancy with a beautiful baby at the end. I will do this. I have wonderful support from my family. These sensations are 100% normal and will result in a happy, healthy baby."
etc.etc.etc.
We really do create our own realities, and it's proven that if you go into it with fear, it will only cause you more pain b/c everything clenches up and creates the opposite effect of what needs to happen for you to meet your baby!
Think of the sphincter law (which is such a weird word, btw). Everything from the tip of your head to your toes is connected, and when you clench your jaw and purse your lips, you'll notice your other orfices do the same. Now put your tongue behind your top teeth, relax your jaw, and open your mouth...and feel everything else relax. USE THAT during labor to help open the birth canal when you're pushing and give that baby the most room possible to process down the birth canal.
You can do this. You WILL do this. Women have literally been made to do this and HAVE BEEN since the beginning of time. I have faith in you!!
Finally, GREAT card by your husband. He seems like a pretty awesome guy. :)
If it makes you feel any better my labor came out of NOWHERE. I literally went to bed crying that I was never going to have this baby and woke up 4 hours later in labor! Enjoy your last days of pregnancy (I know hard to do!), but you'll look back on these 9 months and think you blinked they went by so fast!
Also, the anticipation of labor is scarier than the actual process. I tried not to worry about it because once you're brought to that door you have no choice, but to walk through it right??
Also, PC's note is sooo sweet!
you have every right to feel what you feel right now (IF or no IF) sometimes i think those of use who suffer from IF are soooo much harder on ourselves and dont allow ourselves to have the emotions and frustrations that "normal" pregnant women do- so unfair we have every right to go through the ups and downs and not apologize for it :)
hoping you get some peace and rest and hoping even more that the next days just go flying by!!
Sooo I totally teared up reading your hubby's card! :) I've really enjoyed going back and re-reading your posts as I find myself in the last few weeks of my pregnancy. Thanks!
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