5 beds, one baby

You have all these visions and plans in your head about how things are going to work out when baby is home.  Never say never!  Hence, the sleeping situation!  
Plan... he is going to sleep in the pack and play (bed #1) every night with the monitor on and all blankets off.  Good plan, but he doesn't sleep that way.  So he ends up in your arms and you both sleep hours at a time, warm and snugly, on and off the boob buffet as baby so desires.  After a few days weeks everything in your head says this isn't a good habit and not to mention how unsafe it is according to the experts and research.  Obviously, grandma doesn't like it either so she buys a little cosleeper basket (#2) that goes in the bed.  But baby doesn't sleep and DH and I lose much more sleep trying to fit in the few inches of bed that's left.  So he ends up in your arms and you both sleep hours at a time, warm and snugly, on and off the boob buffet as baby so desires.  Grandma researches and reads about a cosleeper that attaches to the bed (#3) and she wants to buy it.  Agree to try.  DH puts it together and it's no different than the pack and play except that one side rolls down... but it does not extend the bed like we thought.  So DH takes it apart and puts it back in the box (with one or two obscenities along the way).  The original bassinet (#4) in our room that we borrowed from SIL?  A make-shift changing area.  If this baby can't at least see you through mesh, there is no sleeping.  The crib (#5)?  That's a whole other transition to the other side of the house that I am not ready for.  He does like to lay in it, but only wide awake.  
So, the latest plan is to move the pack and play into our bedroom and try to get baby to make it to the first feeding before ending up beside me.  Do I get credit for at least having a plan?  Why do I feel so bad and guilty for a decision that brings hours of sleep and makes me and baby both happy?  Because I also think about the "what if" dangers and the habit that's already looking hard to break and that PC and I need to snuggle too... we have got to start reconnecting (another post for another day).  But I also am not in favor of a whole night of "crying it out" or losing so much sleep that I have nothing left to be able to give him the best care possible the next day. 

Update:  I started this post yesterday.  Baby made it through about one hour in the pack and play.  He was fussy and we kept putting the pacifier back in until the full cry came.  PC says at least it's a start... tonight we'll try for an hour and a half... baby steps:]  Any words of wisdom appreciated unless you are going to side with grandma.  Just kidding.  We are trying to transition but, again, I've learned sometimes you will do what you have to do... so sad to be moving him (okay, and me too) from our happy place! 

Pack and play, great at Christmas for staring at the tree!

In-bed cosleeper and bassinet on other side.  Picture fools you- this is a 5 minute nap!

PC putting the other cosleeper back in the box, as good as a sport about it as he could be!

Crib, great for watching the aquarium!

Mom, snoozing away! 

Crayons on the wall... already?

Not quite.  But we do have a big mess on our hands, literally! 

If you haven't had to deal with the lovely thrush, consider yourself very lucky!  If you have, you probably know about genetian violet.  It's purple topical stuff that I put on my boobs and it ends up in my baby's mouth... but it is said to be one of the most effective treatments of thrush.  We want to get rid of this nasty thrush because there is no freezing or storing breastmilk while it's active and because it causes white spots in my baby's mouth.
Anywho...
this morning PC took the baby for the  6 a.m. diaper change and he started yelling.  I jumped up and yelled "is the baby okay?"  He said "yes, but help!"  Someone (me)- who has a big case of baby brain (if it's any kind of excuse) left the lid open on the genetian violet and then someone else (PC- who really can't be blamed but is just a little bit guilty by association) accidently knocked it over.  A full bottle.  Of stuff that comes with Internet warnings like this: 
"Gentian violet is a powerful staining agent. Stains can be removed, but it's important to act quickly. The longer that nasty stuff sets, the harder it will be to remove."
Understatement.  PC worked quickly to save the hardwood while I made a sad attempt to wipe the cabinets, while listening to a screaming baby with a dirty diaper.  Finally I said "I've got to take care of the baby" and the rest was left to PC.  Good news?  He saved the hardwood!  Bad news?  He's out buying paint right now for the built-ins.  We tried rubbing alcohol and the other Internet suggestion was Vodka, but we've been fresh out of that for nine months now!  
One day it will be funny.  But not today.  Today, we are sick of PURPLE!     
Here...

and here...

and here...

 And I would post a picture of PC's purple feet but he is presently out buying paint.  He took the cabinet door to the store to match up the paint and I'm wondering if he's having to explain to the sales guy that it is a purple stain that his wife uses to paint her nipples.

Okay, maybe we will go ahead and laugh!!!

TVT

I'm joining in on TVT and it's not going to be pretty, but that's the point, right?  I need it today!

Here it is... I'm feeling a little lot resentful of the differences in mommy and daddy duties.  Hormones?  Lack of sleep?  Could there be a little Lupron left in my system? 

Disclaimer:  I am loving every single minute of this sweet time with our precious miracle!  
But when PC gets home, I'm asking "can I get a bath" "can I have a minute to eat" "can I go to the bathroom." DH does all of those things and can get a haircut too!  Y'all should see my hair...both colors:[  Over the weekend, I ventured to the grocery store for 1 hour and made sure it was a time when baby would be satisfied and food was ready if not.  PC said "I'll call our niece if I need help."  I'm not sure if he was joking or not but my expression was you must be joking!  PC is a champ when it comes to diaper changes and laundry and all of my requests of "can you get this or that."  He gets up for the 5:30 diaper change and makes sure that I can get a shower in the morning before he leaves for work.  He goes to every appointment and is very much in love with this baby.  He was my hero in the hospital and through the NICU experience and I still want to post about that when I can let my mind go there again.  I shouldn't even be thought-vomiting about this, but my vision of more 50-50 baby care in the evenings just doesn't seem possible with breastfeeding.  I adore this baby, I adore my sweet PC... but I just want to be able to use the bathroom without yelling "give me one more minute" because baby is crying in the next room and I feel bad for baby and dad. 

There, TVT out.       

Funny Firsts

I can start a post while breast feeding too, loving the iPhone! Any suggestions of apps you can't live without? 

Pictures- The photographer who did the newborn pictures came to our home when Hampton was nine days old.  We just weren't ready to get him out of the house yet so she was super sweet to accommodate us!  From this point on, we will just rely on mom's picture-taking skills since we can't afford frequent professional pictures (that money is still going on the IVF loan!)  I love the naked newborn pics but PC thinks they make our little man look a little too pretty (he doesn't share my awwhhh so sweet thoughts) so I need to add some "little man" pics for daddy!

How about this one?  This makes me laugh every time!  Anytime our little guy sees something or does something new, his eyes get huge... then he decides if he likes it or not... then whether to cry or not. 

Something else that makes me laugh.  (Background- One of the nurses in the NICU gave our baby a pacifier during the night.  I wasn't sure that we were even going with the pacifier but when I saw him hooked up to those IV's and getting comfort from the paci, I was fine with it.)  So, H only likes one kind of pacifier and it's as big as his face.  It goes almost out, then he quickly sucks it back in.  You can see his little mouth from the other side, warms my heart!   

Today we celebrated with our one month old by eating out at the W.affle H.ouse... maybe we'll go somewhere a little fancier for his one year old birthday but (again) we're still paying for IVF! 
To baby- This might be a clue that we are new parents... we didn't know where to put you!  I'm a little embarrassed to admit I asked the cook "where do people put the car seats" and he proceeded to say that he thought it would fit on an upside down high chair.  That didn't work so we kind've wedged you between the table and back seat of the booth... there weren't many people eating there or we would have made someone laugh for sure!  We are learning!  Love you oh so much and can't wait to see what the next month brings!!!    

One Month Randomness

 First, best way to start a post is to send some blog baby love out there with a newborn pic:]  

It's amazing how he's changed so much already as tomorrow we will have a ONE MONTH old, wow!

  

Update on breastfeeding:  Thanks for the comments and suggestions... you all are such a great source of support and information!  I started pumping about 1.5 ounces yesterday, once in the morning, but so far it's been used within the next 4-6 hours to allow mommy to run to the grocery store and to get through our first church service.  It has been so hard to figure out how to get out of the house with or without baby!  I also think that our little guy's thrush has now moved to my breasts:[  Tomorrow I will be getting some gentian violet and vinegar to try and stop it before it really starts.  This will be in addition to the Nystatin that goes into his mouth after each feeding and the probiotic that I'm taking.  Good news is that he is up to 8 lbs 5 oz from his birth weight of 7 lbs 9 oz so we know he is eating well!   

New adventures since the last post:  

A tub bath- and he absolutely loves it... he hates to get out!  

Lost the umbilical cord... actually, the doctor took it off which kind of freaked me out but it's healed fine since then.

First trip to a restaurant... he slept in his car seat while we ate fast!

First trip to church...slept right through!

Announcement cards are being shipped right now- if they turn out cute, I'll pass along the website.  I typed directly on one of our newborn pics and ordered a large quantity for a fraction of the price compared to other sites. 

In other news, PC got an i.Phone right before Christmas and didn't like it (wouldn't you know it) so I took it.  Yes, I'm a Mac girl, but I was anti-iPhone for a long time just because I didn't want to be so connected to work e-mail and texting in my "down" time.  But with a newborn, I am SO glad to have that connection... I can accomplish reading your blogs and a feeding at the same time, woo hoo!  Don't worry, I'm all about the bonding, but our little guy is busy and happy while eating so he doesn't mind if I keep up with my blog friends!  Besides, I usually learn something to add to the new mom tool kit so it's good for both of us.  Now, if a smart phone could just do housework lol:]